Wedding Vows

Marriage Ceremony Repeat

Celebrations During the past year wedding ceremonies changed. It wasn’t a choice – COVID forced couples to reckon with what is most important. The answer is simple. Love.  Hopefully you followed our advice to postpone the mega party and have two wedding celebrations: an intimate ceremony first, and then a larger affair later. Happily, later is almost here! As our communities receive vaccinations and it becomes safer to gather, celebrating with loved ones is becoming a reality. The Ceremony Therefore, the next question is, How to handle the ceremony?  There are many ways to think about this. Of course, one option is to skip […]

Wedding Ceremonies that Unite and Heal

Gay couple with a Justice of the Peace

One of the most significant parts of planning your wedding ceremony is determining what is said. You can write your own vows or ask your Justice of the Peace (or notary) to do so. Or, do it together! Professional marriage officiants are adept at talking with couples to elicit just the right information to be incorporated into the ceremony and achieve your vision. If you are struggling, they’re available to help you find your voice and create messaging that is all you! Let the Sun Shine In After a year of hardship and loss, consider your ceremony and its significance. […]

Writing a Ceremony with Meaning

“I’m pregnant!” or “I won mega bucks”, mean life changing events. Last month, when I asked Linda, a future bride, if she needed an outline for their ceremony she said, “We just want to get married. Bring whatever.”  I said No. I had done that once and the words were hollow; we all felt ill-at-ease. When you put effort into seeking out beloved authors, stirring poets and historical verses, everyone wins! Linda and Matt (after finding their words) held hands under a majestic covered bridge. Her eyes glowed when she heard the words spoken that evoked memories and tugged on […]

Writing Your Own Vows Part 2: How-To Tips

So you’ve read last February’s blog about writing your own vows and overcoming stage fright, and now you and your fiancé have decided that this is what you both would like to do. Your ceremony is fast-approaching, but suddenly you have a case of writer’s block. Get Inspired If you are finding yourself staring at a blank screen, try these things to get the sparks going: Head space: Hit a bucket of balls, cast a line, walk the beach, or stare into a hot fire with a cold beer. Clear the clutter out of your head to make room for […]

Writing Your Own Vows Part 1: Overcoming Stage Fright

When you’re asked if you’ll be writing your own vows, how will you reply? Yes, I can’t wait to affirm my commitment in the presence of witnesses I’m not sure No, I’ll be too emotional to speak Before you answer, here are a few things to consider. A Moment in Time The moment in your ceremony where vows are exchanged is one of the most important in your life story; one that you will never experience again. It’s your opportunity to declare what you will do, or more importantly, who you will be in this union. Once the moment has […]

Quiz Yourself to Find the Right Ceremony Tone

Quiz yourself to determine the right tone for your ceremony

In a conversation with your officiant, you might be asked what you’d like the tone of your ceremony to be. Your JP wants your ceremony to reflect you as a couple — your values, beliefs, passions, and style. How would your ceremony feel overall if it were to express the essence of both of you? If you’re not quite sure how to answer that question, take the following quiz. Add up your answers at the end to find out what tone of ceremony might be right for you. Which of these venues is where you’d most like to be married? […]

A Fresh Take on Old Traditions

Updated traditions in your ceremony

“I like the idea of using the traditions that my mother and grandmother used in their weddings, but I also want to keep my ceremony fresh and a little unexpected.” Each of the elements in your ceremony, readings, rituals, and vows for example, plays an important role in defining your day. Like instruments in a symphony orchestra, when joined together in concert they should swell your heart. The officiant is the conductor. Be sure to have a conversation with him or her about what’s important to you so that it can be included in the score. To get the conversation […]

Getting Married Later in Life? Anything Goes!

If you’re a mid-life (or later) bride or groom, “Relax” might be your mantra. That’s how one 55-year old bride (third wedding) was able to cope when she realized she’d left her bridal bouquet at home in the refrigerator. “My first two weddings were about pleasing other people,” she told Match.com. “But I ended up being very pleased this time around …. We both felt it was our ceremony.” Turning the ceremony into our ceremony can really make the difference when you are getting married later in life. Your ceremony can be anything and everything both of you want it to be. Find a JP who will help make that […]

Your Marriage Vows — Real Or Fairytale?

You want your wedding day to be a dream come true. But should it also be a fairy tale? When you write your marriage vows or talk to your Justice of the Peace about what s/he will say at your ceremony, are there stars in your eyes or are you taking an honest look at your future together? How realistic should your marriage vows be? You know that half of all marriages end in divorce but you don’t expect yours to be one of them. Still, would it make sense to say “I do promise to do my utmost to love you, for […]

5 Tips To Writing Your Own Wedding Ceremony

While it may be true that the ceremony is the radiant sun of your wedding day, around which every other wedding festivity orbits, it is also true that many brides (and grooms) put off until the last moment the design of that all-important center to their nuptials. Why, you ask yourself, why did you tell your JP that you and your fiancée would write the ceremony? Is it too late to ask for help? It’s never too late, until it is. So call your JP now! (and read these tips to snap you out of your panicked brain freeze.) 1. Get Help from […]

Make Sure your Wedding Ceremony Fits Your Circumstances!

How times change! Not so long ago, the idea of living together before marriage was socially unacceptable.  While some couples dared to try it, they dared not do so openly – for the judgment of society could be cruel.  Gay couples also were in jeopardy of social condemnation. In 2014, however, living together before marriage is the rule — the “new normal.”  And gay relationships too are becoming mainstream in the eyes of most Americans.  Often the old words and assumptions underlying the “traditional” wedding ceremony don’t work anymore and need to be updated. The outdated Victorian notions of the “virgin” bride and groom – and […]

Future Shock: The Wedding Ceremony of 2050

While our concept of marriage continues to evolve, surprisingly the wedding ceremony itself has remained remarkably the same. Ask any Justice of the Peace and she will likely confirm that even the most modern couple will not abandon those features of the wedding ceremony that connect them to romance and tradition, most notably the opportunity to voice “I do!” So what is changing about the wedding ceremony? What will it look like in 35 years? If today’s trends are any indication (and of course they are), many weddings will be all about technology. (Surprise!) Virtually married? Bi-location: Your children’s wedding […]

Surprise Your Guests: Get Married!

After living together for 14 years, whenever we talked about getting married, the biggest obstacle was the wedding itself. My  kids were teenagers, his were married with young children of their own. After all this time living like an old married couple, we were embarrassed to make a big deal of it. Yet we wanted our friends and family to be present. On the Friday before a planned party to celebrate his 60th birthday with all the kids and a few friends coming, I had a light bulb moment. Here was the perfect opportunity to have it both ways! (He […]